Look, Mr. Johnson:

We don’t care if you want a trade, and we’re glad you finally said it. But don’t waste our damn time going through this dog and pony show, crying at the Superbowl, crying at the Pro Bowl, crying to ESPN’s Brian Kenny (which we’ll show you in a second) and calling out the only player in Cincinnati that still has a shred of credibility, Carson Palmer.

GET-TO-THE-FREAKING-POINT. It took you three months to get here, and now you can’t even remember what you told everyone before.

Carson says you told him you would be in camp. You get pissed, call ESPN’s John Clayton and say this:

“I don’t know where he got that. I made no assertion to Carson that I would do that. Nothing has changed from what I’ve been saying for three months that I don’t want to play for the Bengals.”

Where did he get that? You probably told him that, because you told Brian Kenny THE SAME DAMN THING:

Kenny: “Say when there’s mandatory attendance for a team, mini camp or whatever what are your plans then?”

Chad: “My plans are to show up and embarrass everyone that tries to cover me”

Don’t believe us? Cue this video to 1:34 remaining in the clip. It’s called effectively getting out your message, and you’ve failed on all levels. Dumbass.