You may remember this guy: His name is Ruben Patterson, formerly of the University of Cincinnati and six NBA teams, the last being the Clippers during the 2006-07 season. He had quite a legal past:

– In 2000 he received a 1-year sentence for attempted rape of the family nanny (at Chez Patterson). Ruben entered an Alford plea (not admitting guilt but understanding a jury might convict him) and while all but 15 days were suspended, because the nanny was underage, Ruben had to register as a sex offender.

– In 2001 he was convicted of misdemeanor assault after a guy scratched his car.

– In 2002 he was arrested and charged with felony domestic abuse of his wife (the charges were dropped, but shockingly Mama Patterson later divorced him).

– And in 2007 he was fined $1000 for not registering as a sex offender. His attorney called it a “misunderstanding”.

So on Thursday we saw Ruben working out at a Cincinnati-area gym. Because of his past, we have no problem making fun of him for carrying his gym clothes in .. um … this:

Keep in mind we here at TMC are fully in touch with our feminine side.

But when you sleep with underage kids? A Louis Vuitton bag probably isn’t the best idea. You become an open target. So we say this: HA HA!